10 items or less: cola update
monday, july 1st, 2024
Yes, that’s right, a mere two weeks after my critically acclaimed and internationally praised cola ranking, I have some new contenders. Would you judge me if I said I spent double the cost on these first two sodas to get them Postmated from Target because I didn’t want to carry them home on the bus? Okay sorry for supporting our local economy!! #tipyourpostmate
Favorite Day Kickin’ Cola
$7.39/6-pack – Target, Brooklyn, NY
I bought these thinking they were just the generic Target brand of cola, but I didn’t realize that they’re also zero sugar? These are sweetened by stevia, and only have a handful of ingredients. Died 2020/Born 2024: welcome back Coca-Cola Life! (That was the short-lived and scarcely-sold stevia Coke.) I’m an aspartame/sucralose/erythritol certified hater, but I don’t mind stevia! It doesn’t leave a cloying aftertaste or cause as much gastrointestinal distress as other diet sweeteners, at least for me personally. This is a really tasty cola option if you’re looking for a low/no sugar soda!
Good & Gather Cherry Cola Sparkling Water
$3.59/8-pack – Target, Brooklyn, NY
A cola seltzer?? and it’s caffeinated? I was so curious and so excited to try these. I was not disappointed. It really tastes like Cherry Coke! It almost even gives the effect of being sweetened, because the flavor reminds me so much of a real soda. I’m not sure how detailed I can get in a seltzer review, honestly – it’s fizzy, it’s flavored, it’s more fun than tap water! An 8-pack also costs less than a single kombucha. Speaking of…
GT’s ALIVE Cola
$3.99 – Brooklyn, NY
IT’S ALIIIIVEEE. I love GT’s kombucha, and I love cola, but I was not expecting this to be good – and I was right! I don’t buy into *~*~ancient healing power of adaptogenic mushroom~*~* marketing, but I still feel like I should be the target audience for this? I just can’t finish this bottle. It has that essence I mentioned about a couple of the other probiotic colas, the essence of root beer. Kind of minty, earthy, made even more earthy because of the mushroom. It’s too sour, too much, too weird for me in general – maybe would be better if you put some booze in ‘em?
Haribo Happy Cola Gummi Candy
$2.49 – Walgreens, Brooklyn, NY
I got these just to be a bit cheeky, but I haven’t had them in such a long time. Honestly, not as good as I remember? There are better Haribos – Twin Cherries are the best and I stand by. Still, I’m no snob, these have a nice lemony-cola flavor and I would happily eat the whole bag in one sitting. Sidenote #1 The spelling of “gummi candy” reminds me of this vintage cursed Youtube video – please, before you click, turn your volume all the way UP. Sidenote #2 I’ve been watching a lot of Love Island and finally googled what “fizzy” candy means in the UK because SEAN won’t stop talking about fizzy watermelon slices. (fizzy=sour)
10 bullet points or less:
please send me any more colas you see in the wild
(i know i haven’t found jarritos yet)
do brits not have candy brands like why are all of their favorite candies so generic sounding
love island usa is kind of eating love island uk this year
personally victimized by this image
