10 items or less: ranking canned shirleys
who will be crowned queen? 👑
Some of my earliest memories involve drinking shirley temples – at the Moose Lodge, at a Chili’s, at my Grandma’s house. I was no Leo Kelly (the Shirley Temple King of the Northeast), but I knew my way around a good shirley. Imagine telling my 5-year-old self that in the future, you can skip the jar of maraschinos and 12-pack of ginger ale and buy a ready-to-drink shirley temple by the can at any store near you! and also a bunch of bad stuff happens in the world but I wouldn’t tell her that.
So here’s my follow up to my alt-cola ranking! Just so you know, these shirleys were so hard to rank because they’re genuinely all pretty similar and all women are queens 👑
🍒 2026 is the year of Shirley! Celebrate by putting animal crackers in your soup, checking out some Shirley Jackson books from your local library, and cracking open one of these cans! 🍒
#7 Slice
$2.59 – Target, Brooklyn, NY
Something went wrong in the Slice factory with this one. I’ve tried other Slice sodas and they’re totally fine! Generally comparable to Poppi. But this straight up tastes like cough syrup. The cherry flavor is totally sickly, which I don’t understand because they use all natural juices and flavors. I tried to share this with a friend and we couldn’t even finish it. Let’s take this one back to the labs!!
#6 Spindrift
$2.99 – Stop & Shop, MA
To be fair to Spindrift, they’re one of the first brands I saw coming out with a shirley temple flavor. But this one just misses the mark. This isn’t really a soda, it’s a sparkling water sweetened with a little bit of juice. For me, it’s just too tart and needs a bigger punch of cherry flavor.
#5 Boylan’s
$2.99 – Brooklyn, NY
I love Boylan’s soda – they ranked #1 in my favorite colas! But in this day and age, it’s hard to justify drinking 43g of sugar without any caffeine. It’s super sweet, but I respect that this is just a regular soda, not trying to be anything else. This would be great for splitting with a friend, or enjoying as an ice cream float!
#4 Olipop
$2 – Brooklyn, NY
The next few rankings are so close to a tie, it’s splitting stems here. Classic taste with that little bit of vanilla that all Olipops tend to have + this one gets the Shirley Temple King’s seal of approval (#olipoppartner 🕵️♀️)
#3 Bloom Pop
$2.99 – Walgreens, Brooklyn, NY
This alt-soda has a proprietary blend of bacteria as their prebiotics, instead of added fiber like Poppi and Olipop. I really like this one – very tart and bright and sweet, and no weird aftertaste. I love that Bloom Pop is coming out with a lot of their own unique flavors like Winter Pomberry and Peach Pineapple, excited to see what they do next!
also I know Bloom doesn’t have Poppi Super Bowl money but I really feel like they missed out on nabbing Charli XCX for a campaign first…BLOOM POP THE SOUND OF MY HEART!
#2 Poppi
$2.59 – Target, Brooklyn, NY
From first sip, soooo good! Super flavorful – maraschino cherry, ginger, vanilla, everything you’re looking for in a shirley temple. It just barely gets the edge over the last few for me.
#1 Stiller’s
$2.99 – Brooklyn, NY
This one tastes the most “real” to me – like lemon lime soda and maraschino cherries. So refreshing and nostalgic, keep up the great work Ben!! And apparently “if you put your ear to a Stiller’s you’ll hear Ben Stiller whispering the ingredient label.”
10 bullet points or less:
does Shirley Temple make money off these ???
i hope so
i’ve been saying this for years: a SPIKED SHIRLEY should be called a SHIRLEY TEMPLE BLACK
(that was her married name)