10 items or less: flamin’ hot
monday, july 15th, 2024
This week we’re catchin’ waves and fightin’ fire with fire – as in, eating a lot of jalapeño flavored things during a heat wave, and going to the beach.
La Croix Beach Plum
$7.99 – Brooklyn, NY
What better place to drink a Beach Plum LaCroix than the beautiful white-sand beaches of Staten Island? Exactly as Mr. Bryan LaCroix himself intended. Beach Plum is a very abstract name for any seltzer, but especially this specific flavor – this tastes like straight up Capri Sun fruit punch. It’s one of my favorite flavors, and I love everything they’re cooking up in the La Croix factory the past few years.
Turtle Chips Flamin’ Lime
$5.49 – Brooklyn, NY
I spotted these at my local produce market/bodega/grocery store…not sure what you call the kind of store that has a bunch of cheap fruit and foreign snacks. Apparently these are a Korean brand of chips, and the turtle shell shape is patented, so don’t even try to remake these at home. Turtle brand is WATCHING YOU. They’re a 4-layer puff snack, and kind of remind me in texture and flavor of Bugles, or baked Lays? These are so addicting, and I definitely want to try the other flavors, but I already expect Flamin’ Lime to be the best. Not too sour, not too spicy. The only downside is that when I got to the bottom of the bag, it was a lot of broken layers.
Trader Joe’s Jalapeño Limeade
$2.79 – Trader Joe’s, Brooklyn, NY
I did a very conservative Trader Joe’s haul last week (please clap), and surprisingly this is the only thing I really got of note. What do I need to say about Trader Joe’s frozen dumplings, bagged salads, and chocolate covered raisins? You already know they’re good. And so is this limeade. (You gon’ jump if TJ made it.) This has the potential of being very on brand for Brat Summer. Definitely a fun mixer to share with some friends, but I do wish it was a bit spicier.
Jalapeño Cheetos
Free with hot dog – Dog Day Afternoon, Brooklyn, NY
You’ve probably had these Cheetos before, but you’ve probably forgot how good they are. Sometimes you might not be in the mood for the spiciness of a Flamin’ Hot, so these are a little milder, and have a great jalapeño flavor. Lil shoutout to Dog Day Afternoon in Windsor Terrace, you always get a free bag of chips with your hot dog 🌭 I’m not the Chicago dog authority, and you might hate that I get the vegan chili dog, but it’s a decent vegan chili dog!
Flying Embers canned bevs
$4 – Brooklyn, NY
I’ve tried a few flavors of these, so this is a blanket review of Flying Embers drinks – they all taste good, and they’re all so, so strong. It can be hard to get your hands on canned cocktails in New York because of the strict liquor laws, but you can get these at any grocery/corner store. I drank two 12-oz cans during a Star Wars double feature, and by the end I was like, who is what’s father? But maybe that’s because I got bored. The point is, as someone with a lower tolerance who hates beer, these do the dang job.
Simply White Cheddar Pasta Roni
$1.50 – Key Food, Brooklyn, NY
Tell me why this is one of the best boxed macs I’ve ever had? I randomly picked this up on sale, and dare I say, it could replace Annie’s Penne & Four Cheese in my #1 spot. Okay that might be taking it too far actually. But this really surprised me in flavor as well as quantity, it makes a big serving of mac. I am often enticed by “simple ingredients” marketed packaging, but this essentially tastes like the Shells & White Cheddar Pasta Roni, which I grew up eating so often. From the ingredients, I guess the “simply” difference is that this recipe doesn’t include palm oil and a few other things, but palm oil is pretty terrible for the environment, so I think that’s a win!
10 bullet points or less:
[snooki voice] WHERES THE BEACH
what’s a normal amount of times to reference kroll show (2013-2015) in daily life
im sorry for almost slandering you annie. i’ll never replace you annie
psa lactaid is not a replacement for milk in savory cooking…..i have a visceral boxed mac memory from my childhood that ruined the whole pot
would u be mad at me if i called the flying embers drinks “IPAs for girls”